Sometimes, I just wanna be simple.

I think I'm not too complex. In fact I can confidently say that I am actually a very simple-minded girl. I'm easily amused (equally easily irritated as well), easily pleased, and easily bluffed to (in DT's words in mandarin, so "pen tan").

But I wanna be simpler.

Like, not to worry so much about $ and how to live my life more meaningfully. Really, these are questions I have been asking myself on a very constant basis these days. You only get to live once. Sometimes I wish you get to live like a couple of times. Just like a cat with nine lucky lives.

Say, if you are born with a silver spoon in your mouth:
- What will you be when you grow up? What kind of business would you be running?
- Who would you marry?
- How would you raise your kids with all the money that you have? Send them to government school or a private school? Lavish them with BabyGuess, X-Box and a Beemer? Or teach them values of integrity and modesty?

Ok, now say if you are born in a relatively poor family where you constantly need to worry about spending within your means:
- Just how strong or weak will you be?
- What will be your battles?
- Will you come out a loser, surrendering your fate to destiny or would you fight destiny, work hard (and smart) and come out a winner?

Wouldn't it be interesting then to be able to feel what it's like living out the other kinds of lives? For me it is. I'm curious as hell. To live only once is truly non-sufficient. But that only makes life much more interesting and precious to lose and waste.

So anyways, I really shouldn't stress myself so much with these issues. I just wanna think happy thoughts for now.

Thinking: happy tots

What you see now is a circle of pink balls with one circulating around it.

Focus on the cross in the middle. Now look at the circulating ball, not pink anymore is it? It's green now.

Amazing how our brain works, ain't it? Means to also say, that we don't always see things the way we think we see. Things or even people are not what they appear to be.

Looks can be deceiving.

Feeling:  zen

Guide to Savor the Ultimate Bliss

1. Bite a small hole by the side.
2. Pucker up your lips in manner of trying to kiss someone. Pull #72 close to mouth, aim at bitten hole and ...
3. You suck. Suck the glorious juice out of #72 like you've never sucked before.
4. Swallow
5. Go "Ahhhhhh"
6. Sink teeth into meat. Half it. Chew s l o w l y, in manner of cow chewing grass. Mouth working in circular motion.
7. Swallow
8. Go "Ahhhhhh" again and to demonstrate the ultimate satisfaction... you moan.

#72. MMmmmMmmmm

*o r g a s m i c*

Feeling: full

Movie trailer of The Breakup starring Jennifer Aniston and Vince Vaughn playing on TV.

Girl: Hey, Jennifer Aniston! The Breakup! I wanna watch!  We go watch that k!

Boy: You wanna break up with me ah?

*smack head*

Other Related Topics:
love, break up

Feeling: bouncy

Photo quality a bit bad hor?

Of coz, it was longer than that. We had a quarter of it. Erm, first time baking this way, but just as nice . The next time round, I'm gonna cook up some chocolate sauce to glaze over the top. Yum!

You know it's fun to have an ever-willing guinea pig to try all my funny, first-time recipes. I feed, he obediently gobbles them up. Whether will die later or not also doesn't seem to bother him

Recipe from:
http://www.usj.com.my/bulletin/upload/showpost.php?p=151834&postcount=7

Other Related Topics:
chocolate cake, recipe, moist cake, steamed cakes

Feeling:  accomplished

This morning as I was leaving to work.

Scenario: In the elevator
Elevator door opens. Little boy (around 2 yrs old) steps in with his grandma.

Grandma: Boy, say hello!
Little Boy: *sulking and faces his face away*
Me: He's shy *giggles*
Grandma: No no, in the mornings he is very moody. Come on, say helloooo.

Still refusing, the little boy continues to sulk while holding two toy cars in his hands. Elevator door opens. I walk out, turn my head to say byebye to moody little boy.

Grandma: Say byebye to auntie! Bye bye auntieeee.

OUCH!

Every sentence, every word. They speak my Heart.

Jem - Maybe I'm Amazed

Maybe I'm amazed at the way you love me all the time
Maybe I'm afraid of the way I love you
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you pulled me out of time
and hung me on a line
Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you

Maybe I'm a girl and maybe I'm a lonely girl
who's in the middle of something
that she doesn't really understand

Maybe I'm a girl and maybe you're the only man
who could ever help me
Baby, won't you help me understand

Maybe I'm amazed at the way you're with me all the time
Maybe I'm afraid of the way I leave you
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you help me sing my song
Right me when I'm wrong
Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you

***

LOVE THIS SONG.

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.

You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so great after all.

You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is acceptable and what is not. You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to know better. You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person.

One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.

You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while wining the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

I keep forgetting that I'm indeed 25 already.

Sometimes when I read someone's profiles on papers, magazines, and blogs, and she happens to be 23 and I'd go, "Oh, same age as me only what."

I'm 25. TWENTY FREAKING FIVE! Don't really know why the hell I still think that I'm 23! And I did not even try to disillusion myself into thinking that I'm 23. I REALLY THOUGHT I WAS 23 despite going into the 2nd month of being a 25-year-old. *horror*

Perhaps I was the happiest at 23? Come to think of it, no. I was still with the s.o.b. ex.

Gah!

Ladies, you know what'd be good to carry around in your handbags?

Your Nokia, Sony Ericsson, Samsung or LG Chocolate, comes with the mirror function. MirrorMorph I shall call it. Copyrighted ok!

Ok imagine, these scenarios:

1. You at work. Had a little snack by the desk. Lipstick / gloss wiped off and flushed into the digestive system, so what do you do? You reach into your handbag, grab your lipstick / gloss on one hand while the other hand, search in vain for that compact powder (which comes with a mirror) of yours. Uh-oh, left it at home by the sink. You are walking around the world unarmed with a mirror. HOW???
   
2. Ok, now imagine you're at a party. You spot a cute guy. You wanna make sure you look yummy enough so you're strategizing the amount of steps taken to the washroom and time taken to pull that Paris Hilton pose infront of him. Not good, not good, you think to yourself. Ain't happening coz by the time you get into the ladies, fix your hair and glaze those lips with an extra coat of gloss, he's as good as gone.

BUT imagine, if you had a mobile which comes with the MirrorMorph (copyrighted again!) function. Just a tap on the key, and *zernnnng* VOILA! The screen changes into a mirror!

Brilliant kan? Kan? Kan?

So remember, if one day Nokia so brilliantly 'invented' the mirror conversion on your mobiles, please remember, you read it here first on Blissful Delirium. I is brilliant!