Every sentence, every word. They speak my Heart.

Jem - Maybe I'm Amazed

Maybe I'm amazed at the way you love me all the time
Maybe I'm afraid of the way I love you
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you pulled me out of time
and hung me on a line
Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you

Maybe I'm a girl and maybe I'm a lonely girl
who's in the middle of something
that she doesn't really understand

Maybe I'm a girl and maybe you're the only man
who could ever help me
Baby, won't you help me understand

Maybe I'm amazed at the way you're with me all the time
Maybe I'm afraid of the way I leave you
Maybe I'm amazed at the way you help me sing my song
Right me when I'm wrong
Maybe I'm amazed at the way I really need you

***

LOVE THIS SONG.

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.

You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so great after all.

You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is acceptable and what is not. You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to know better. You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person.

One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.

You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while wining the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

I keep forgetting that I'm indeed 25 already.

Sometimes when I read someone's profiles on papers, magazines, and blogs, and she happens to be 23 and I'd go, "Oh, same age as me only what."

I'm 25. TWENTY FREAKING FIVE! Don't really know why the hell I still think that I'm 23! And I did not even try to disillusion myself into thinking that I'm 23. I REALLY THOUGHT I WAS 23 despite going into the 2nd month of being a 25-year-old. *horror*

Perhaps I was the happiest at 23? Come to think of it, no. I was still with the s.o.b. ex.

Gah!

Ladies, you know what'd be good to carry around in your handbags?

Your Nokia, Sony Ericsson, Samsung or LG Chocolate, comes with the mirror function. MirrorMorph I shall call it. Copyrighted ok!

Ok imagine, these scenarios:

1. You at work. Had a little snack by the desk. Lipstick / gloss wiped off and flushed into the digestive system, so what do you do? You reach into your handbag, grab your lipstick / gloss on one hand while the other hand, search in vain for that compact powder (which comes with a mirror) of yours. Uh-oh, left it at home by the sink. You are walking around the world unarmed with a mirror. HOW???
   
2. Ok, now imagine you're at a party. You spot a cute guy. You wanna make sure you look yummy enough so you're strategizing the amount of steps taken to the washroom and time taken to pull that Paris Hilton pose infront of him. Not good, not good, you think to yourself. Ain't happening coz by the time you get into the ladies, fix your hair and glaze those lips with an extra coat of gloss, he's as good as gone.

BUT imagine, if you had a mobile which comes with the MirrorMorph (copyrighted again!) function. Just a tap on the key, and *zernnnng* VOILA! The screen changes into a mirror!

Brilliant kan? Kan? Kan?

So remember, if one day Nokia so brilliantly 'invented' the mirror conversion on your mobiles, please remember, you read it here first on Blissful Delirium. I is brilliant!

Patrick solo says:
you are exactly like the phoenix

My cousin sister's baby is so cute!!!

If I were to die last night, the reason given would be of: Cuteness Overload

This is Yan Yan at 3months old:

And she loves to PLAY! Her idea of fun is: She, placing her little hanky over her face and waits patiently for someone to remove it and go "chak!" at her. She can go on and on playing 'her game' for as long as you want. Such a happy babygirl she is!

I SAYANG HER TO BITS!

Heh, my home here is crazy. I am back at Puchong for the weekend.

Mom is blasting this song which sounded vaguely familiar to me. The infectious starting part of Madonna's Hung Up. "Mom? Madonna???" Few minutes later, "Ohhh, Abba's original version." Hahaha!

My brother. He is furiously reading and digesting alien characters of the language they call Mandarin. Heh! Apparently he has an exam at 2pm. He's taking Mandarin classes with the gf. Aww, so sweet those two

My dad. Haha, got an earful from him this morning. I was still sleeping when he took my car out to fix the dent. He got back and was nicely lecturing me. See, I have this bad bad habit of waiting for the petrol level to go really low before refilling it. Yesterday while driving back to Puchong, I was pushing my luck. You know how when your petrol level is low, and the alert light starts blinking every few mins or so? Yesterday, mine wasn't blinking anymore. The sign was on a permanent alert by then

So my dad got stranded somewhere nearby with my car unable to move  He got my brother to drive out to buy a bottle of petrol and brought it over to him and the apparently VERY thirsty car

Got an earful this morning. "You ah, always tell you to pump petrol but you like to wait last minute. If you got stranded one day how??"

Me: I call David lor.

Dad rolled eyes. LOL.

I love watching women taking it all out in beach volleyball.

Beach volleyball has always been one of my favorite sports. I used to play volleyball back in highschool and every now and then, we'd organize a couple of games at the now-defunct Ballz Beach Club, Bangsar. Heck, I used to work there part time while studying in college, hehe. One incident I remembered very clearly was there was this Hitz.FM Fugitive Search going on. And apparently, the clue was: Balls. So people soon filled up that place and started asking around, "Are you the Hitz.FM Fugitive??" Of which, I retorted back, "No, but are you???" Heh!

Hehehe. I loved that place. A convenient spot to have a game of beach volleyball, right smack in the middle of KL. Too bad, they closed it down. You know, every now and then I'll have some crazy (sometimes, stupid) business ideas. So I've been toying with that idea of having a beach volleyball space for people to sweat it out, have a good time and whatnot. A one-stop sports centre. Well, people have their futsal spaces, I want my beach volleyball space, can? Hehe! One thing I've learnt back in Ballz was, the SAND - sand has to be CLEAN. Else, people start having rashes, and you get complaints, yada yada yada. Heh.

How much do you think people would pay to rent an hour of space to play? I still have the rates but that was a couple of years back. Isaac! Interested or not?

So yeah, I love watching women play beach volleyball. Heh!

Recently, DT and I had to go all the way to the Pos Laju in SHAH ALAM to collect a parcel. When we got there, the person in charge told us that we could've just called earlier and to have that parcel sent to a post office nearest to where we live and subsequently, collect from there instead.

Dang.

While driving back from the post office in SHAH ALAM...

Girl: How come your brother never figured this out? I've always thought he's the very smart one.
Boy: Then me? Not smart ah?
Girl: Different. Your brother is Book Smart. You, Street Smart. Street Smart better, seng mok mar.
Boy: Ahhh... Then you what?
Girl: Me? *mind curious to know just how 'smart' she appears to Boy*
Boy: Ok, my brother is Book Smart. I'm Street Smart. You...

Boy: No Smart.

Got bf so mean one or not???

Ok, so I saw you last night.

You weren't as great as before. In my opinion, you were trying so hard to be funny and comical, so much as to a point I got fairly irritated.

And you allowed that slut... Ms Swann to play you around and tied you up to the Pearl and have you blown up into oblivion??? What were you thinking! You lost my respect there, Jack.

All in all, quite entertaining. But not as good as the first installment. Ratings: 2.5/5